It congratulates you, on your arrival, at having escaped from the slop pails of the other 49 states. Alistair Cooke, Only Texas could turn defeat into a legenda song, a tourist attraction, and a major motion picture. Rosemary Kent, If a mans from Texas, hell tell you. We asked twelve renowned artists to illustrate their favorite Texas sayings, and we present as well a sample of other axioms and adages common to the statea collection of sayings as big as all hell and half of Texas. As the old saying goes. I thought it was a joke. She oversees the magazines travel and style sections. Like trying to bag flies.Like putting socks on a rooster.Easy as pissing up a rope. I'm so glad you never act your agelet's have some fun tonight! Related Topics. "Happy birthday to someone who is smart, gorgeous, funny and reminds me a lot of myself from one fabulous chick to another!". : Janine Turner, There is a special mystique to Texas. Unknown 118 Likes Birthday quotes Friends quotes Yippee your birthday is finally here. Unknown Author. What to make of a state that is so focused on itself? Hell eat anything that dont eat him first. "Being from Texas, I would say I favor a pair of jeans you can wear some boots with." -Jensen Ackles "In Texas, we practically come out of the womb in jeans." -Kelly Clarkson "Texans ain't Texans if they aren't willing to boast about the state they call home." ~Anon "Texans ignored 'better,' long ago forgot the useless word 'good.' Waco: American Apocalypse Doesnt Even Try. Happy birthday." "Count not the candlessee the lights they give. Hot will cool if greedy will let it.Take a tater and wait.Dont get your panties in a wad.Wash off your war paint. -Robert Kiyosaki, I was always proud of being from Texas and, you know, maybe that was part of fearlessness. "You May All Go to Hell and I Will Go to Texas" Davy Crockett This quote truly epitomizes the spirit of Texas. -Sam Houston, Im from Texas, and one of the reasons I like Texas is because theres no one in control. It starts at 5:30 p.m. on Friday night and events are scheduled until 11 p.m. Saturday night. 257 points. May you have a delicious and partylicious birthday! See more ideas about birthday greetings, birthday, greetings. Im madder than a wet hen! Dumb as a box of rocks. Lets not preach to the choir. Best birthday, cutie! If a duck had his brain, it would fly north for the winter.He doesnt have enough sense to spit downwind.If he was bacon, he wouldnt even sizzle.If brains were leather, he couldnt saddle a flea.He carries his brains in his back pocket.Dumb as dirt.Dumb as a box of rocks.Dumb as a barrel of hair.Dumb as a post.Dumb as a wagon wheel.Dumb as a prairie dog.Dumb as a watermelon.He doesnt know come here from sic em.He doesnt know enough to pound sand down a rat hole.He cant ride and chew at the same time.So stupid if you put his brains in a bumblebee, itd fly backwards.If all her brains were ink, she couldnt dot an i.If all his brains were dynamite, he couldnt blow his nose.He dont know which ends up.He dont know a widget from a whangdoodle.He dont know nothing from nothing.He dont know diddly squat.He couldnt pour piss out of a boot with a hole in the toe and the directions on the heel.If he had a brain, itd die of loneliness.So thick-headed you can hit him in the face with a tire iron and he wont yell till morning.He could screw up an anvil. I'm taking your birthday as an opportunity to thank you for all that you are to me. Need Texas sayings about girls from Texas? Brave as the first man who ate an oyster.Brave as a bigamist.Brave enough to eat in a boomtown cafe.Hes double-backboned.Hes got more guts than you could hang on a fence.Hed shoot craps with the devil himself.Shed charge hell with a bucket of ice water. And funny birthday saying about age that shed a positive light on getting older. No place like Texas, my home, sweet home. Willie Nelson, And finally, the last and the best Texas quote yet. Here are 10 Texas Slang Words To Sound Like A Local. I'm so grateful I get to celebrate your special day with you. -Molly Ivins, The Texan turned out to be good-natured, generous and likable. May your birthday overflow with downy teddy bears, the comfiest blankets and the loveliest cake ever. Congratulations, and may life keeps smiling at you as it has been up to now. May God smile on you and be gracious to you. Honestly, there are so many funny sayings about Texas that you would get sore as a boil after reading them all. Just a small serving. 3. Celebrate your birthday with the greatest joy for the priceless gift of life, be filled with joy that brings renewed strength. -Larry McMurtry, This is Texas. To me old age is 15 years older than I am. May you always wake up in the morning with a smile on your face. happy birthday png and psd. - E. He could talk the legs off a chair.He could talk the gate off its hinges.He could talk the hide off a cow.He could talk the ears off a mule.He shoots off his mouth so much he must eat bullets for breakfast.Hes got a ten-gallon mouth.She speaks ten words a second, with gusts to fifty.Her tongue is plumb tuckered.Shes got tongue enough for ten rows of teeth.She beats her own gums to death.He blew in on his own wind.Hes a live dictionary.Hes a chin musician.She has a bell clapper instead of a tongue.He was vaccinated with a Victrola needle. And memories to store. State historic sites include the Casa Navarro in San Antonio, Texas. All hat, no cattle. Never ask a barber if he thinks you need a haircut. Dan Rather 0 Copy To me, it's really the heart of Texas. Happy Birthday to you, my dearest friend. March 2, 2011. Shes itching for something she wont scratch for. for dreaming for something too big! The 60 Best Happy Birthday To Sister Quotes from Heart; Happy Birthday To Cousin; Love Quotes for Him; The 60 Romantic Cute Love Quotes For Her from Heart. Texas is a cult. Hissy fit. As dark as the inside of a wolf.Dark as coffin air.Dark as a pocket.Dark as a cow.Dark as a blue norther.Dark as the devils riding boots.Dark as truck-stop coffee. This one's famous, y'all. Happy birthday to my favorite person who's still younger than me! If youre headed to Texas, check out my guide to visiting the San Antonio Missions,the Houston Space Center, and Mustang Island. But what the hell? -Texas Department of Transportation. At Texas Swingers Clubs, the Lifestyle Is Booming, My Brothers Ashes, the Bayou, and an Enigmatic Life, What Is Left to Say About Waco? I know that you'll attain more this year dear. September 23, 2021; by Victoria Hudgins; Inside: Happy 28th Birthday Quotes + Captions. I think you can see more sky in Texas than you can see anywhere else in the world. Idina Menzel, For all its enormous range of space, climate, and physical appearance, and for all the internal squabbles, contentions, and strivings, Texas has a tight cohesiveness perhaps stronger than any other section of America. John Steinbeck, Texans ignored better, long ago forgot the useless word good. Everything in Texas is best. Edward Smith, Never forget, son, when you represent Texas, always go first class.- James Michener, A born Texan has instilled in his system a mindset of no retreat and no surrender. We share comprehensive travel guides and tips for anyone traveling around America. J Jamie Oakes-Mitchell 33 followers More information Wishing you a Texas sized birthday! -James Michener, For a few precious moments Im back in Old Texas, under a high sky, where all things are again possible and the wind blows free. Anybody who wanders around the world saying, Hell yes, Im from Texas, deserves whatever happens to him. Hunter S. Thompson, The definition of insanity in Texas is so insane that its impossible to be insane in Texas. Malcolm McDowell. John Lennon 2. An 18th birthday is exciting but your 21st birthday will be even better. If I live to see your grandchildren, I'm going to tell them all the Birthday pranks we played on you every year. May God bless our brothers and sisters in the gray zone. Happy birthday, friend! No hill for a stepper.Slick as a whistle.Easy as pie. It's a better use of salt. Y'all is the southern contraction of you all, and it's meant to be used for when you're addressing more than one person. birthday psd clipart gold. It would be an honor to get dismembered by a chainsaw. Editors note: This article was first published in print in 1994. Texas literally has a pledge they say every morning. Hes got a hitch in his gitalong.Sick as a dog passing peach pits.All stove up.Im so sick Id have to get better to die.Sore as a boil.Her hoppers busted.As full of pains as an old window.Ive got the green apple nasties.He looks like death warmed over.So sick he needs two beds.Pitiful as a three-legged dog. Happy 65th Birthday! May 5 2011 at 4 43 am the best thing to come out of oklahoma is 35 south. I feel sorry for you. Otherwise, I wish you a very happy day, darling. Birthday Quotes Happy 28th Birthday Quotes & Funny Captions. Singers Jessica Simpson, Beyonce, Hillary Duff, Kelly Clarkson and Demi Lovato are a few famous faces who hail from Texas. Here are my favorite quotes about Texas, including inspiration from poems, literature, pop culture, and quotes by famous Texas authors! Get ready for your Birthday prank today as well. You are such a sweetheart babe! Hell squeeze a nickel till the buffalo screams. It was like Austin, Texas. Craig Ferguson, Read More: 25 Famous Quotes about Austin, Texas. Were still figuring out how to spell tolerance. There Are No Two Sides in Texass Fiery Truck Debate, At Brownsvilles Annual Grito Contest, Its All About Yelling Your Heart Out, The Astrodomes Decline From Eighth Wonder to Eighth Blunder of the World, Mosquito Hawks Are Flitting All Over Texas, I Biked the I-35 Hell Route From Austin to San Antonio So You Dont Have To. You know exactly what you're doing. The How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days star, 53, and . (For people without US cell phone plans). Dreams are the only things that give you reasons to push yourself ahead. Texas is a cult. Lindsay Mcelwee, I Like The Image Texas Brings To Mindthat Of Bigness, Of Strength, Of Goodness. Ninfa Laurenzo, The enemy never sees the backs of my Texans! General Robert E. Lee, CSA, Texas history is a varied, tempestuous, and vast as the state itself. If hes not, why embarrass him by asking? John Gunther. DR. SEUSS (more Dr. Seuss quotes) Let us never know what old age is. Red dirt never quite washes out, and pine pollen is tenacious as original sin. Look what the cat dragged in.Companys coming; add a cup of water to the soup.Weve howdied but we havent shook.Put on your sitting britches.Lets chaw the rag. -Cherie Priest, Texans aint Texans if they arent willing to boast about the state they call home. On your Birthday, my dear sister, I wish I can go back in time and slap myself every time I hurt you. I hope this year's aliens are friendlier. 2. She occasionally writes about travel, too. They don't treat beatniks too good in Texas. Here go some of our favorite Texas sayings. - The US death toll from . I got treated very badly in Texas. I wish everyone the world over had the dominating spirit that motivates Texans. Billy Clayton. "Put candles in a cake, it's a birthday cake. Make your friends and family chuckle with these sayings, or make them laugh out loud with funny 60th birthday quotes.Witty quotes can also make great slogans for 60th . 9. 17 Fabulous Midwest Tourist Attractions You Need to See, How to Visit Camel Rock: A Popular Santa Fe Roadside Attraction Near Tesque, NM, 10 Places with Ancient Polygonal Walls Around the World that You Can Visit, How to Visit Playa Negra, Puerto Rico: Viequess Beautiful Black Sand Beach. Before you leave for Texas make sure you have a validTravelInsurance Policybecause accidents happen on the road. Hey, we're thrilled that you're here! for that talkative friend. A toast to you, birthday girl! It's your 60th birthday! May the Lord strengthened every crooked path, make every rough part in your life smooth, and exalt every valley that may be in your life (Luke 3:5). You cant share Texas quotes without sharing Texans quotes, right? Herere the best Texas sayings, quotes, and expressions. Join us on this incredible adventure! Cant dance, never could sing, and its too wet to plow.I could sit still for that.You cant beat that with a stick. Find Texas road trip ideas and itineraries. (Say what? They work to live there. Robert Rodriguez (this is one of our favorite Austin quotes! Port Arthur people thought I was a beatnik, though they'd never seen one and neither had I. I'm from Texas originally, and I've always wanted to be in a horror movie, so I've gotten both of my wishes with this project. Cute and Quirky 60th Birthday Sayings. 3. Austin, Texas is the subject of many popular quotes, sayings, and slogans! Most Texans know about the references to the Lone Star State size in Texas quotes and sayings. Hell squeeze a nickel till the buffalo screams. for that one really miserly friend. Showing search results for "Texas Birthday" sorted by relevance. Got a big hole in the fence. He wasnt born, just squeezed out of a bartenders rag.Drunker than who shot John.Snot-slinging drunk.Drunk as Cooter Brown.Drunk as a skunk.Dont chop any wood tonight; Daddys coming home with a load.Tighter than bark on a log.Ive got the whistlebelly thumps and skull cramps. I love the fact that Texas is so big, but you dont feel small because of that. He stays in the shadow of his mamas apron.If he was melted down, he couldnt be poured into a fight.Hes first cousin to Moses Rose.He wouldnt bite a biscuit.Hes yellow as mustard but without the bite.He may not be a chicken, but he has his henhouse ways. If a trip around the world cost a dollar, I couldnt get to the Oklahoma line.Hes so broke hes busted all Ten Commandments.Poor as a lizard-eating cat.Hasnt got a pot to pee in or a window to throw it out of.So poor I had a tumbleweed as a pet.I ate so many armadillos when I was young, I still roll up into a ball when Ihear a dog bark.So poor we had to fertilize the sills before we could raise the windows.Poor as sawmill rats.Hes broke as a stick horse.Hes too poor to pay attention.So poor the wolf wont even stop at their door.So poor their Sunday supper is fried water.Too poor to paint, too proud to whitewash.
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texas birthday quotes